Didn't post yesterday because I was running around registering with employment agencies, which I know I needed to do, but just doubt it'll do much good.
I find myself getting enraged at the smallest things, I mean seeing-red-mad. I know it's because I feel impotent and vulnerable, but the anger is starting to scare me. I want some revenge against the company that downsized me, I want to see the building burning and crashing to ground and rats running rampant over it all. I want to see the executives homeless and begging on the side of the road. I don't care if this is mean spirited. I don't care.
I'm tired of it all, all of it.
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Yes I can relate - I have to keep a check on the fact that I have a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other reminding me that two wrongs don't make a right... but it's hard - very very hard.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard and I was having a very bad day when I posted that. Thanks for the support!
ReplyDeleteI have had similar thoughts - very very mean and malicious. I know where they live too - so I could really do some damage - sometimes I slip into those dark cracks dreaming of mean things I could do to get them back. Then I think why would I take a chance of ruining my good name and reputation. When I start thinking mean spirited I remind myself that my comfort should be that in the end God knows all and I should find comfort in that – but I have days where that doesn’t work either. Just remember Karma will take care of them – we don’t have to anything. But wouldn’t it be great to hear about it? Okay slap me… Have a great night.
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