One of the tough things that happens when you become unemployed is that you find out who your true friends are. Especially the longer you are without a job. I've noticed that people don't call as much, and even in the online forums (ie email, Facebook) they seem to be nonresponsive. That really hurts: unemployment is not contagious, or at least it's not spread thru human contact with the already-jobless.
At first, there's a lot of sympathy, people saying they'll keep an eye out for you or put in a good word. But now, after 3.5 months, or however long you've been on the dole, you're lucky if you get a one line email.
But the true friends, ahhh. They're the ones that will still invite you to join them for a drink, or return your calls or emails, and the first thing they ask is not "So, how's the job hunt going?" I hold these friends in my heart.
As for the others, well, for the time being I'm letting go. Maybe we can pick things up later, maybe not. But for now, energy must be conserved. It might be that they are really really busy, and I can understand that. But, as a teacher of mine once told me, when I was complainng about not having enough time to get things done, "All you have is time, it's how you choose to use it that matters. You make time for the things that are important."
Focus on the vision of employment and know that some of those other folks might be just busy, or they may be scared themselves. I admire your courage to keep going. You've explored many options and are not afraid to get outside the box! Keep going!
ReplyDeleteWhen my Mom was sick she lost her friends one at time - as she became sicker - no one called, no one visited. I asked her friends to at least send her a card so she would think someone cared about her. The sicker she got the fewer friends she had. She died 12-19-09. I was there for her to the very end. I never abandoned her.
ReplyDeleteWhen I got laid off I found that the people I loved at work, and maybe it only seemed like they loved me back because- we saw each other every day for over 7 years - when I got laid off I found out the majority didn’t care for me. No one called - and no one really cares. I called them but they never returned my calls… they were told by management not to talk to me. Probably because the company thought I was going to sue them since they only laid off people over 50 yrs old.
I have learned that people will stick with you through thick and thin, but when it gets too thick they all thin out. Lessons learned – our skin gets thicker and life goes on.
Take care, Freckles